The idea that people had sex before the 20th century really freaks me out. Like George Washington probably got a blow job and that makes me uncomfortable.
(via pierce-the-pewds)
one time I was working at Dolly Parton’s water park as a photographer in the lazy river, and taking pictures and what not and I look up and see this very familiar black man floating in a tube toward me.
and it is Akon. So I’m like ‘hey Akon would you like a picture with your family today?’ He is all like ‘no thank you sweetie’ and I was all “well you have a good day, Akon”
he said you too and floated on.
(Source: landofbluesmoke, via earthnation)
If we’re friends, there’s a 106% chance that I’m always petrified that you secretly hate me.
(via lolheyitskita)
i just pretend i know what im talking about 150% of the time
if you can’t blow them away with your brilliance, baffle them with your bullshit
i think i just found my senior quote
(via nallelybelly)
| me half-way through shaving one leg: | i dont want to do this anymore |
